


The Significance of a few Astral Specs of Dust

by SherlockWolf



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Coping, F/F, F/M, Feels train y'all, Friendship, Gen, Grieving, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I tried to make this as non-shippy as possible to please everyone, M/M, Multi, Other, Post-Kingdom Hearts III, aka ship whatever you want in this its open ended
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-06 16:21:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 2,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18391991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SherlockWolf/pseuds/SherlockWolf
Summary: "Sora didn’t turn into astral specs of dust for no one to write angsty heart-wrenching fanfiction about how everyone copes with the disappearance of the one who saved their lives and the worlds time and time again and god do I have to write it myself?"@cometrose this one's for you bud*note: the snippets aren't in chronological order





	1. Terra

    Riku tells him _Sora_ means _sky_ , the day they spend visiting Sora’s memorial. Terra finds the name fitting. Only a soul like Sora’s could encompass as much love as the sky of a world—the sky of a universe.

    It’s just the two of them, the others busy or understanding that both men need to be alone. Riku said he wanted to share a secret with Terra, who isn’t about to deny him anything. Riku’s just had his best friend, most precious person, ripped away from him. Terra knows exactly how that feels.

    Sometimes he wishes he’d had the proper circumstances to mourn, but knows he didn’t deserve that. Part of his atonement can be helping Riku grieve.

    Riku’s arms hug his chest, Terra respectfully stands beside him.

    The sun is setting over the world, turning the sky and ocean a beautiful blush of oranges and pinks. The sand glows, Riku’s tears shimmer.

    “I wanted to say I’m sorry.” Riku speaks, voice rough and ragged.

    Terra wonders if he’s been getting enough sleep. Or any.

    “I couldn’t protect them—Sora, Kairi. The strength you gave me…for nothing.”

    But that simply isn’t true. Sora and Kairi are protected by a different strength than what Riku’s thinking of. Terra’s sure of it, because it’s _inner_ strength that inspired him to pass on the keyblade to Riku. That day they first met, Riku’s desire to protect his friends had resonated with Terra. It still does. It’s what he’s always wanted most, it’s the drive behind his want to be a keyblade master, it’s the one task he, too, has failed.

    Eraqus once told him failure could only lead to success. Now Terra knew that to be true.

    “ _In your hand take this key. So long as you have the makings, then through this simple act of taking it’s wielder you shall one day be. And you will find me, friend, no ocean will contain you then. No more borders around, or below, or above, so long as you champion the ones you love._ ”

    Terra repeated the keyblade oath, Riku listening with his head bowed.

    “You have physical and magical strength, Riku. But that’s not why I passed on the power of the keyblade to you. You love your friends, Kairi and Sora, as much as I love Ventus and Aqua. I knew it then and I know it now. If you believe in Sora, then you should believe in yourself, too. You’ll find him because he makes you unstoppable.”

    Riku smiles, nods.

    Then wraps Terra in an unexpected but welcome hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and I hoped you enjoyed! <3 sherlockwolf


	2. Aqua

    The girls come to her.

    Aqua has never felt more honored in her life.

    They want to build a memorial for Sora, on the play-island by the Paopu tree. But they need her finesse with magic to do it.

    It’s not a complicated spell, and she helps each of the trio practice for a few hours so that all four of them can create the memorial together.

    They stand in a square, weaving the water between the four of them. Each of the young women place their object within the swirl, and Kairi adds in two extra. One for Roxas. One for Riku.

    When they finish, the waterworks begin. So does the group-hug.

    Aqua’s heart hurts. Does Sora know he’s so loved? She hopes so. It was the knowledge of love that kept her alive in the Realm of Darkness. Wherever Sora is now, she hopes love is keeping him alive, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and I hoped you enjoyed! <3 sherlockwolf


	3. Lea

    The clock tower crew is quiet today. Their usual teasing banter has been swiped away, drowned like the sunlight behind a cloud. With fresh hearts and bodies, Roxas and Xion appear to be lost at sea.

    Lea wishes he could do more for them, but they have such a profound connection to Sora he can’t begin to fathom what the loss of him must feel like much less help the two feel better.

    Ice cream can’t heal a broken heart, no matter how much one might want it to.

    Roxas leans back on his hands and kicks his feet, one after the other, against the tower. Each _thud_ resonates with the seconds that click against the clock.

    “I hate this.” Roxas announces.

    Lea and Xion take their eyes off the town below to look at him, waiting for an explanation of what exactly he hates _today_.

    One of Roxas’ new hobbies since coming back with a fully-formed heart has been to create a list of things he likes and dislikes, things he loves or hates. This is the second time Roxas has hated something. The first had been squash.

    “Why hasn’t Riku gone after him yet?”

    Lea and Xion exchange a glance.

    “What do you mean?” Xion asks.

    “It’s their thing, isn’t it? Sora saves Riku, Riku saves Sora, on and on, over and over. We all want Sora back, so why hasn’t Riku _gone_?” Roxas vents to the sunset.

    Ah. Frustration. An emotion Lea knows Roxas is familiar with, but is now experiencing for the first time in full force.

    Lea’s not really sure about the answer, himself. He, too, has been wondering why Riku hasn’t tried anything yet. From their few and far between interactions, and Xion and Roxas’ stories, Lea knows that Riku would do anything for Sora. So what’s taking him?

    Unfortunately, Lea can only think of one reason. It’s a reason no one wants to be true. But maybe Riku is the wisest of the seven.

    Lea puts his arm over Roxas’ shoulders to give him a comforting hug. Xion follows his lead and takes Roxas’ closest hand in hers. Roxas looks up at Lea with watering eyes, and he knows the two of them are thinking the same thing. He hates to be the one to have to say it aloud. Roxas can put that on _his_ list.

    “He thinks Sora is dead.”

    None of them want it to be true. Sora’s given them this second chance to be together—they owe him everything.

    “Then _I’ll_ go get him.” Roxas snaps, brave and determined as ever.

    Lea wishes it were that simple.


	4. Namine

    The drawings come to her. Slow, at first, perhaps once a month. Then quicker, once a week, maybe every two.

    Now she’s drawing once a day.

    At first, nothing but darkness. A few golden eyes here or there amongst the shadows.

    Then, blurred images—memories. Ones she erased or ones that remain, she doesn’t know. They’re all too fuzzy. She can pick out vague shapes defined by colors, but that’s all.

    Now, they’re dreams. Distinct people, places, things. Most she’s never been to, a few she has—the old mansion, Twilight Town, the Castle that Never Was. Most with silver and pink hair, smiles and laughter, a few with sadness and heartbreak, locks of white.

    After all this time, after all these drawings, Namine has yet to meet Sora again after the events of Castle Oblivion. He has yet to meet her and _remember_ and yet…

    Namine cries the first time her face appears among Sora’s dreams. For him to be unable to recall meeting her, yet know _her_ face…Sora really is the embodiment of love. She feels so accepted that she wants to cheer and hug him.

    She settles for calling Kairi to tell her she _knows_ Sora is alive.

    The dream she drawing now is no happy thing, however. She sees Sora’s face peering at her through the thick dark. His skin is sunken, eyes hollow, hair turning black at the tips. There is a smattering of blood on the right side of his face, jagged around the edges like broken glass.

    He’s not smiling—he’s grinning, a menacing smirk laced in his lips.

    Sora is in danger.

    Namine calls Riku.


	5. Ventus

    The universe is a different place after ten years of living within Sora. It’s brighter, happier, more welcoming and loving. Xehanort is gone, too, which is a burden off Ventus’ chest. He’ll never have to see that awful, twisted man again. Perhaps Master Eraqus can forgive the old man, but not Ventus.

    Not even Sora could convince him to do that.

    Even though Sora had graced Ventus’ heart with such vibrant care, Ventus feels...incomplete, now. As though all his life he’s waited for Sora to fill a niche, and now that Sora is gone from his life Ventus feels the emptiness of that niche as he never would have if it had never been filled.

    It hurts.

    At least his friends are here, finally safe and home. Even Chirithy! Ventus never thought he would see them again.

    Chirithy tells him how they were able to return home, from a place they call “The Final World”. The story shocks Ven, at first, but then he laughs. Of course! How could Sora do anything less than show kindness?

    Ventus has never been more proud of anyone in his life—not even in comparison to the day Aqua became a keyblade master, though he would never tell her that.

    A knock on the door of his room in the Land of Departure draws Ventus’ attention from his musing. He’s spent the day practicing magic, relearning it with Chirithy’s help, and is now relaxing sideways on his bed.

    He and Chirithy exchange a glance—Aqua and Terra aren’t supposed to be home for another two days, and certainly they would’ve called if they’d be coming back early.

    He answers the door and feels all light, joy, and love evaporate from the world, consumed by that prideful smirk.

    “Hello, brother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So apparently I'm throwing plot into this? Whoops.


	6. Xion

    It’s hard to choose an item that represents what Sora means to her. Not to mention convincing Roxas to do the same is near impossible.

    Xion has her own perception of Sora—the boy whose love created her, whose face she stole, whose heart could not exist without the image of her. Xion was a fundamental piece of Sora. Sora, the boy who protected her and welcomed her even when he didn’t know her, who spoke her _name_. Were it not for his choices, she would never have _existed_. Were it not for his choices, _she_ would never have existed. She loves Sora. She loves that he gave her life, even if he didn’t mean to.

    Roxas has his.

    Not that he’s shared it. Xion wonders if it’s because Roxas holds a grudge, but knows that can’t be it. Roxas loves too much. Loves _Sora_ too much.

    Eventually, Xion settles on a doll. It’s tiny, fits in the palm of her hand, a person, but a blank one. No hair, no eyes, nose, mouth…nothing. Four limbs sewn to a trunk with a head on top.

    Xion makes one change. One addition.

    In red ink she etches a heart on the doll’s chest, the kind found in Kairi’s signature on the letters she sends Xion and Namine.

    It takes a few more days of pulling teeth before Roxas hands her something—a blue marble. He doesn’t say anything about it, so Xion doesn’t ask. But by the pinched look of his face, she knows this little sphere means a lot to him. Like Sora.


	7. Roxas

    The next time he goes to the beach, he’s alone. He doesn’t want anyone with him, doesn’t want Xion’s curious eyes or Lea’s deadpan realism. Roxas just wants to miss Sora _alone_.

     There was a time with just himself and Sora. Sora adamantly insisting Roxas deserve to live, to be his own person, his whole self, Roxas clinging to him like a lifeline.

    No, more than _like_. Sora _is_ his lifeline. Roxas can still feel him, even now when Sora is so far away.

    It hurts to feel that connection but not be able to do anything about it. Roxas has relied on their connection to rebel, to become who he is and find his identity. He’s used their connection to bring himself to Sora, to literally fall from the sky and save the day. The look on Sora’s face!

    Now, the connection is lifeless. Roxas can’t manipulate it no matter how he tries. He doesn’t feel Sora’s emotions as he once had, can’t send his own, can’t pull on it to go find him.

    Never once has Roxas been without Sora. And though he knows death hasn’t truly separated them, it sure as hell feels like he’s alone.


	8. Kairi

    Traveling doesn’t help. Visiting doesn’t help. Training doesn’t help. Beating up endless swarms of heartless _doesn’t help_.

    Sora won’t leave her alone, not for one second.

    She’d be mad at him for it, if he were here. But that in itself is the exact reason she’s haunted.

    The play island is quiet, when she arrives. Waves lap at the docks, gulls squabble over a fish on the shore, and some creature that lives in the jungle passed the playhouse cackles. And yet, it’s stifling. As though a spiritual piece has been snuffed out. Or a light—if she wants to be less poetic and more realistic.

    Her toes crunch in the warm sand, leading her along a well-beaten path. She doesn’t go to the Paopu tree. She knows what awaits her there, and she’s not ready to deal with him just yet.

    She continues under the bridge, to the other half of the island where Sora and Riku had once raced each other in the name of winning her affections. She’d laughed at them then, and laughs at them now. Those boys, _her_ boys, are just so _silly_. As if it could ever be a competition—she loves them both _so much_. The two people who mean more to her than anything else in this ever-widening universe.

    Kairi stands next to their raft, left to lean against the side of the rock so many years ago. The wood has started to rot, the ropes worn down. She doesn’t even bother to open up the basket where she’d stored the mushrooms and fish—she can smell it from here.  

    Her heart aches for that day. She wants nothing more than for the three of them to be together again, to laugh and play and make dumb jokes. She wants to see Sora’s lopsided grin as he teases her mercilessly, wants to play monkey in the middle so she and Riku can tease Sora for being short, wants to pretend to be the Lady stolen and held hostage by the world’s most friendliest pair of pirates.

    More than anything, she wants to hear Riku laugh again.


End file.
